The Illusion of Safety: Are Smart Devices a Lifeline or a Threat?

When you have kids in 4th or 5th grade, this probably sounds very familiar. Your child comes home begging for a smartwatch or a phone. Even though many schools, including those in our district, have now banned devices in classrooms (thankfully!), kids still want them for after-school use.

As a parent, I feel conflicted. While I would never allow my child to have a smartphone at this age, I do see the appeal of a smartwatch. A device that allows my child to call me and has a tracker so I know where they are? That sounds like a great safety measure.

It gives me peace of mind knowing my child’s location, and perhaps it would even make me feel comfortable letting her take short independent trips to the store or visit a friend’s house. But then I have to ask myself: What am I really teaching her?

Are We Teaching Safety or Dependence?

My goal as a parent is to teach my children independence and confidence. I want them to trust their own judgement, to navigate their surroundings, and to problem-solve when they encounter difficulties.

If my child gets lost, I want her to learn to ask for directions or to pay closer attention to landmarks. I want her to keep track of time on her own, to plan her outings responsibly, and to uphold her commitments without relying on constant external oversight.

Beyond that, I believe children deserve a degree of privacy. When I was a child, I had freedom. I didn’t always take the shortest way home, sometimes lingering at the playground or chatting with friends a little longer. I even made some mistakes - like skipping a class or sneaking a cigarette - but these experiences helped me develop a sense of autonomy and control. Shouldn’t we allow our children the same space to grow, to test limits, and to learn from their choices?

The Dangers of Constant Surveillance

I recently coached a parent who monitored her 12-year-old daughter closely through a smartwatch. One day, she discovered that her daughter had left school grounds to visit McDonald’s with a friend. The mother was furious and grounded her for a week.

But this raises an important question: Should we even know what our children are doing every second of the day? Because once we know, it’s nearly impossible not to act on that information.

Kids should be allowed to have their own secrets and make their own mistakes. Testing boundaries is a natural part of growing up.

Yet, in the name of safety, many parents are now tracking their children 24/7, believing it offers protection when, in reality, it may do the opposite.

The False Sense of Security

What are we really trying to protect our kids from?

• Kidnapping? A tracker won’t prevent someone from discarding the device.

• Car accidents? A GPS won’t keep them from harm.

• Harassment? A smartwatch won’t stop someone from bullying them.

• Getting lost? They can ask for directions.

• Being late? They should learn time management skills.

  
  

If your child struggles with time management, organization, or staying on track, a smartwatch won’t teach them these skills. Instead, it makes them even more dependent on external support.

The Greater Risks: The Digital World

While many parents worry about the physical world, I believe the bigger danger lies online. The world outside is statistically safer than ever, but the digital landscape is becoming increasingly risky - especially with companies like Meta and X reducing their fact-checking measures and accountability.

The recent TV series Adolescence serves as a chilling reminder of this reality. In the show, parents believed their son was safe in his room, unaware that he was being humiliated on social media and exposed to dangerous vlogs that ultimately radicalized him.

Smartphones introduce children to an unfiltered world of social media, cyberbullying, and online dangers far more concerning than walking home alone from school.

Are We Helping or Hindering Independence?

It’s ironic - many parents believe that by giving their child a smartwatch, they are granting them more independence. But in reality, we are teaching them to rely on a device rather than their own instincts and skills. Instead of fostering resilience and confidence, we are creating a generation of kids who look to a screen for guidance instead of trusting themselves.

Final Thoughts

I’m not saying you shouldn’t allow your child to have a smartwatch or tracking device. But I do encourage you to ask yourself: Why? If safety in the real world is your main concern, are there other ways to teach your child to navigate the world responsibly?

Rather than relying on technology, I’d rather equip my child with the skills they truly need to grow into a capable, confident, and independent person.

Because the device that is supposed to keep my child safe in the physical world, could potentially be the biggest threat for the emotional safety of my child.